Posted on August 27, 2008
Miracle on Old Street
Posted under Injuries
“The Apostrophes Prosthetics Department works yet another miracle”
Following Sunday’s bullish, muscular performance against Oceans 11, Turner’s long-term injury worries appear to be behind him.
“It’s great to have him fit again,” opined chairman Ernest Borgnine, “but that 5-year contract he’s been angling for is now bumpaper in the groundsman’s outside toilet.”
Fans’ forums are ablaze with rumours that Turner is hoping to move “on a Bosman” at the end of the next season when his £250,000-a-week contract expires.
Yon Turnip’s new ankle is actually made from reclaimed bits of the notoriously-bionic Queen Mother making him technically 1,237th in line to the throne – FACT.