Abbreviated match report: Sporting Apostrophes vs Green Park
“awaiting photo”
Sporting Apostrophes battled to a hard-earned draw against table-toppers Green Park in last Sunday’s mesmerising division II encounter.
“We beat them for the first time earlier in the season, so we knew they’d be gunning for revenge,” Ernest Borgnine informed the attendants at the post-match press jamboree. “They’re a solid, organised side, boasting at least 100 subs for each match, so you’ve got to give them credit. We’re the only team to have pummelled them into submission with the onion cannon, so we have every right to be proud of our achievements.”
Match highlights include: Turner violations, a rare but exciting spectacle; Wessely’s fiery temper getting the better of him; sheath pony from Stickland; Pacheco violation; a rare, onion-free sandwich for Farnsworth, to the dismay of fans; up-tempo groundwork from Correa.
Sporting Apostrophes’ hopes of promotion have taken a firm kick in the teeth, but with Borgnine’s comprehensive dental insurance policy the team have every right to remain optimistic. A terrible injustice!
Stats
Score: 3-3
Squad: Correa, Farnsworth, Pacheco, Stickland, Turner, Wessely.
Goals: Turner (2), Pacheco (1).