Abbreviated match report: Sporting Apostrophes vs Team Wang
Last Sunday’s match against Team Wang ended in a surprising 7-1 reverse for the world’s favourite football team.
“Those pigs! They’ve improved immeasurably since our last meeting” complained chairman Ernest Borgnine, enraged at the terrible injustice of it all. “The uncoordinated buffoons that littered their squad were an embarrassment, players unworthy of the most special of special schools. Their new signings are a world apart: we underestimated them and were punished accordingly.”
With the exception of Stickland’s long-awaited return from injury, Apostrophes fans had little to cheer, the solitary onion bag violation arriving courtesy of a Wang deflection. A terrible injustice!
Score: 1-7
Squad: Hawkins, Hinceman, Stickland, Wessely, White.
Goals: own goal