Sporting Apostrophes

Pele's love-children finally unite!

Posted on July 3, 2008

New sponsor confirmed

Posted under Announcements, Press releases

Hawkins Goal Celebration

“Hawkins wears the new Super A’s shirt at the opening polyesterceremonials”

Sporting Apostrophes are delighted to announce a new shirt sponsorship deal with Shaw Tyre & Exhaust Co. Beloved chairman Ernest Borgnine signed the £2,500,000 one-season contract at the prestigious Lancashire offices of the team’s new sponsor.

“They’re proper excellent” the chairman enthused, stroking the new team shirt with his strong, manly left hand, whilst stroking his flaccid penis with his delicate, feminine right.

Squad numbers for the new season will be confirmed shortly.

2 Responses to “New sponsor confirmed”

  1. Floating Puffer Says:

    Our chairman must be a bit lop sided 2 left hands.

  2. midnight beardsley Says:

    The number 9 shirt is confirmed as a snug fit ( like a Shaw Tyre’s tyre ), impervious to the passage of cooling breezes and washed thoroughly with a fabric softener, the perfume of which matches almost exactly that of the previous wearer’s glistening man-sweat. And apparently I’m not allowed to wear it to bed no matter what.