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	<title>Sporting Apostrophes &#187; Injuries</title>
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	<description>Pele's love-children finally unite!</description>
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		<title>Broken Hawkins forced to sit on the sidelines</title>
		<link>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2009/10/broken-hawkins-forced-to-sit-on-the-sidelines/</link>
		<comments>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2009/10/broken-hawkins-forced-to-sit-on-the-sidelines/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 17 Oct 2009 14:32:54 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Alan Helicopter</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Injuries]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sportingapostrophes.com/2009/10/broken-hawkins-forced-to-sit-on-the-sidelines/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;Hawkins stares into the middle distance, longing for the day he is reunited with his sheathes&#8221; Handsheath exponent Hawkins&#8216; season is in ruins as his life-threatening shoulder injury stubbornly refuses to mend. &#8220;I&#8217;ve gone through metres and metres of brown paper and at least 10 gallons of vinegar but it&#8217;s made no difference,&#8221; he whimpered. [...]]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Train gang</title>
		<link>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2009/08/train-gang/</link>
		<comments>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2009/08/train-gang/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 14 Aug 2009 12:02:13 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Alan Helicopter</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Injuries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Team news]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sportingapostrophes.com/2009/08/train-gang/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;The world&#8217;s greatest athletes limber up prior to Sunday&#8217;s fixture. From left to right: Kimberley, Pacheco, Turner, Bell, Hinceman, Stickland&#8221; The &#8220;beast from Baltimore&#8221; returns to the line-up for his first appearance since June. &#8220;juryman&#8221; Bell joins him, before what could prove to be a lengthy absence in the high court. Stickland will resume sheath [...]]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>The essence of glory</title>
		<link>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2009/02/the-essence-of-glory/</link>
		<comments>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2009/02/the-essence-of-glory/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 06 Feb 2009 16:23:02 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Alan Helicopter</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Injuries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Team news]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sportingapostrophes.com/2009/02/the-essence-of-glory/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;The team go through a punishing fitness regime before Sunday&#8217;s fixture. From left to right: Farnsworth, Bonell, Lissimore, Kimberley, McInerney, Hawkins, Hinceman, Wessely, Stickland.&#8221; The world famous Super A&#8217;s will field the following legends for Sunday&#8217;s fixture against old rivals One Flew Into The Keepers Net: Hawkins Hinceman Kimberley Lissimore McInerney Wessely With &#8220;terrorist&#8221; Farnsworth [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2009/02/the-essence-of-glory/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Back to goal, back to work</title>
		<link>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/11/back-to-goal-back-to-work/</link>
		<comments>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/11/back-to-goal-back-to-work/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 05 Nov 2008 17:33:59 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Alan Helicopter</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Injuries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Team news]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/11/back-to-goal-back-to-work/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;With their sponsorship deal with Shaw Tyre &#38; Exhaust Co. in ruins, the team practice their trademark &#8216;back to goal, don&#8217;t defend&#8217; manoeuvre in unbranded sweatshirts. From left to right: Lissimore, Wessely, Bonell, White, Kimberley, Hinceman, Farnsworth&#8221; Rock biscuit Bonell is scheduled to return, his on-off tattoo injury still a source of mischief. The Swede [...]]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>2</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Taking the strain</title>
		<link>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/09/taking-the-strain/</link>
		<comments>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/09/taking-the-strain/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 10 Sep 2008 14:13:25 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Alan Helicopter</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Injuries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Team news]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/09/taking-the-strain/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;Turner dry wretches at the sight of Stickland&#8217;s groin injury as McInerney, in a state of arousal, unleashes the camcorder&#8221; Stickland&#8217;s programme of advanced stretching has landed him on the Sporting Apostrophes injury list for the second time this season. &#8220;Typical! After such a good performance on Sunday he&#8217;s now sidelined for several weeks thanks [...]]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>It&#8217;s training men &#8211; hallelujah!</title>
		<link>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/09/its-training-men-hallelujah/</link>
		<comments>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/09/its-training-men-hallelujah/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 05 Sep 2008 15:29:54 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Alan Helicopter</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Injuries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Team news]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/09/its-training-men-hallelujah/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;With the smell of a potential victory filling their manly nostrils, the athletes accelerate to a mild canter. From left to right: Hinceman, McInerney, Stickland, Turner, Hawkins, Farnsworth, Kimberley&#8221; League newcomers Real Ale Madrid face the daunting task of lining up against a team of Apostrophes legends: Farnsworth Hawkins Hinceman Kimberley McInerney Stickland Turner]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Behold the amazing Super A&#8217;s</title>
		<link>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/08/behold-the-amazing-super-as/</link>
		<comments>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/08/behold-the-amazing-super-as/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 29 Aug 2008 14:42:17 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Alan Helicopter</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Injuries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Team news]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/08/behold-the-amazing-super-as/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;The team set off on their punishing 0.2 mile jog. From left to right: Farnsworth, Bonell, Hawkins, Kimberley, Hinceman, Stickland&#8221; Fans&#8217; favourite Hawkins is scheduled to report for sheath duty following his promotional tour of Berlin, accompanied by the out-of-form Kimberley. Farnsworth, rested for last week&#8217;s fixture, returns to the Super A&#8217;s starting line-up. Bonell, [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/08/behold-the-amazing-super-as/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Miracle on Old Street</title>
		<link>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/08/miracle-on-old-street/</link>
		<comments>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/08/miracle-on-old-street/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 27 Aug 2008 11:23:01 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Alan Helicopter</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Injuries]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/08/miracle-on-old-street/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;The Apostrophes Prosthetics Department works yet another miracle&#8221; Following Sunday&#8217;s bullish, muscular performance against Oceans 11, Turner&#8217;s long-term injury worries appear to be behind him. &#8220;It&#8217;s great to have him fit again,&#8221; opined chairman Ernest Borgnine, &#8220;but that 5-year contract he&#8217;s been angling for is now bumpaper in the groundsman&#8217;s outside toilet.&#8221; Fans&#8217; forums are [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/08/miracle-on-old-street/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Bocchi&#8217;s season over</title>
		<link>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/08/bocchis-season-over/</link>
		<comments>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/08/bocchis-season-over/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 19 Aug 2008 16:08:36 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Alan Helicopter</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Injuries]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/08/bocchis-season-over/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;Onanism and bestiality: the unforgiving road to recovery offers no dignity&#8221; Sporting Apostrophes&#8217; list of casualties continues to grow following news that Italian defender Bocchi&#8217;s knee surgery will keep him on the sidelines until 2009 at the earliest. &#8220;He&#8217;s a Tottenham fan, what did you expect?&#8221; sighed chairman Ernest Borgnine upon hearing the news. &#8220;I&#8217;m [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/08/bocchis-season-over/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>The Super A&#8217;s workin&#8217; it</title>
		<link>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/08/the-super-as-workin-it/</link>
		<comments>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/08/the-super-as-workin-it/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 12 Aug 2008 16:09:25 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Alan Helicopter</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Injuries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Team news]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/08/the-super-as-workin-it/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;The team work up a sinister, un-Godly sweat in their 100% polyester, non-breathable training tops purchased by the almighty Shaw Tyre &#38; Exhaust Co. From left to right: Farnsworth, Bonell, Hawkins, Kimberley, McInerney, Turner&#8221; Fans&#8217; favourite Bonell is scheduled to return following his 3-match absence. The Swedish dynamo will be joined by long-term injury victim [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/08/the-super-as-workin-it/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Team news for Sunday&#8217;s thrilling double-header</title>
		<link>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/06/team-news-for-sundays-thrilling-double-header/</link>
		<comments>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/06/team-news-for-sundays-thrilling-double-header/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 25 Jun 2008 11:13:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Alan Helicopter</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Injuries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Team news]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/06/team-news-for-sundays-thrilling-double-header/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[The Super A&#8217;s squad for Sunday&#8217;s matches is currently: Bocchi A Bocchi J Bonell Hawkins Hodgkiss Kimberley McInerney Reid (one-off celebrity guest appearance from the West Midlands speed merchant) As this is a two-match Sunday the fee is of course doubled. For eight players it&#8217;ll be £8-a-pop (8 x 8 is of course 64 &#8211; [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/06/team-news-for-sundays-thrilling-double-header/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Fans&#8217; favourite sidelined through injury?</title>
		<link>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/06/fans-favourite-sidelined-through-injury/</link>
		<comments>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/06/fans-favourite-sidelined-through-injury/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 24 Jun 2008 17:21:15 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Alan Helicopter</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Injuries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Team news]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/06/fans-favourite-sidelined-through-injury/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;Injury is no excuse for letting oneself go&#8221; Five appearance legend Turner, still suffering from the injury problems that have plagued him this season, is a major doubt for next week&#8217;s exciting double header against Unsung Heroes and the spastics. &#8220;The ankle has been killing me all season, hand sheathes or no hand sheathes,&#8221; he [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/06/fans-favourite-sidelined-through-injury/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Sunday&#8217;s line-up&#8230; so far</title>
		<link>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/06/sundays-line-up-so-far/</link>
		<comments>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/06/sundays-line-up-so-far/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 19 Jun 2008 10:49:43 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Alan Helicopter</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Injuries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Team news]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/06/sundays-line-up-so-far/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;Hawkins&#8217; unorthodox training methods are a recipe for suck cess&#8221; The following players will be lining up for the Super A&#8217;s for Sunday&#8217;s match against FC Mackenhegan: Bocchi Bonell (TBC) Hawkins Kimberley McInerney Turner Diepeveen or Hodgkiss &#8211; if either of you are available for selection this week, please voice your athletic desires.]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/06/sundays-line-up-so-far/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Squad news</title>
		<link>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/06/squad-news-3/</link>
		<comments>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/06/squad-news-3/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 12 Jun 2008 12:32:04 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Alan Helicopter</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Injuries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Team news]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/06/squad-news-3/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;No! THIS is how you tackle, young man!&#8221; Probable line-up for Sunday&#8217;s game (one additional player TBC): Bocchi Diepeveen (TBC) Kimberley Mysterious &#8220;Moose&#8221; Stickland Turner Fans&#8217; favourites &#8211; an update The club has been inundated with phone calls and threats from supporters, demanding to know the whereabouts of some of their favourite players: Bonell &#8211; [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/06/squad-news-3/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Sunday&#8217;s line-up</title>
		<link>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/06/sundays-line-up/</link>
		<comments>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/06/sundays-line-up/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 06 Jun 2008 16:53:48 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Alan Helicopter</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Injuries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Team news]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/06/sundays-line-up/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;Hawkins contains his fury by chewing a plastic anger-supressant&#8221; Crippled by managonies in his knees and ankles, Hawkins will wrestle the pain barrier to the deck and drop defiant faecal pellets in its mouth. Three cheers, the hero! Probable line-up for Sunday&#8217;s game: Bocchi Davies (TBC) Hawkins Hodgkiss Kimberley Stickland Turner]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/06/sundays-line-up/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Squad news</title>
		<link>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/06/squad-news-2/</link>
		<comments>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/06/squad-news-2/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 05 Jun 2008 16:57:51 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Alan Helicopter</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Injuries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Team news]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/06/squad-news-2/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;Ever-present Bonell &#8211; torn between club and country&#8221; Probable line-up for Sunday&#8217;s game: Bocchi Bonell (injured + international duty &#8211; TBC) Hawkins Hodgkiss Kimberley Stickland Turner (whereabouts unknown?)]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/06/squad-news-2/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Apostrophes on the rampage?</title>
		<link>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/06/apostrophes-on-the-rampage/</link>
		<comments>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/06/apostrophes-on-the-rampage/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 02 Jun 2008 12:07:10 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Alan Helicopter</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Alcohol]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Injuries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Team news]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/06/apostrophes-on-the-rampage/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Tabloid rumours of ill-discipline with the ranks of the Super A&#8217;s were given further credence following McInerney&#8217;s &#8220;night on the tiles&#8221; following the 4-2 reverse against table-toppers Rigford Sea-Hawks. The coach&#8217;s tofu and Ribena diet was abandoned in favour of roll-ups and Guinness in what witnesses describe as a shocking display of wanton excess and [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/06/apostrophes-on-the-rampage/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>The agony of de feet</title>
		<link>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/05/the-agony-of-de-feet/</link>
		<comments>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/05/the-agony-of-de-feet/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 27 May 2008 15:55:23 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Alan Helicopter</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Injuries]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/05/the-agony-of-de-feet/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;Battered like a sausage, the team&#8217;s meat is throbbing with anxiety&#8221; Rooted to the foot of the table and with a the squad ravaged by injuries, next Sunday&#8217;s fixture against table-toppers Rigford Sea-Hawks looks set to be real challenge for the Apostrophes. Full line-up to be confirmed later in the week, but the current state [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/05/the-agony-of-de-feet/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Rearguard action puts McInerney in the stands</title>
		<link>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/05/rearguard-action-puts-mcinerney-in-the-stands/</link>
		<comments>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/05/rearguard-action-puts-mcinerney-in-the-stands/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 24 May 2008 21:51:03 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Alan Helicopter</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Injuries]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/05/rearguard-action-puts-mcinerney-in-the-stands/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;A right pain in the George Michael&#8221; Top scorer and chain smoker McInerney is a major doubt for Sunday&#8217;s league fixture following a freak arse injury. &#8220;I was just parking the motor, when, upon depressing the clutch, I felt a real tightness in me arse cheek,&#8221; he wailed. Scurrilous tabloid rumours suggest the injury was [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/05/rearguard-action-puts-mcinerney-in-the-stands/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Squad news</title>
		<link>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/05/squad-news/</link>
		<comments>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/05/squad-news/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 21 May 2008 13:15:56 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Alan Helicopter</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Injuries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Team news]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/05/squad-news/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;You rotter, don&#8217;t punish me!&#8221; Probable line-up (one additional player TBC): Bocchi Hawkins Hodgkiss McInerney Stickland Turner Unsubstantiated rumours persist of a freak training ground incident that may sideline midfield engine Turner for Sunday&#8217;s game. More news when we have it.]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://sportingapostrophes.com/2008/05/squad-news/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>5</slash:comments>
		</item>
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